'Twas the night before Christmas 2011.....Calvin Walker Style!

'Twas the night before Christmas in Two Thousand Ten

The Feds made a case, the indictment was in

The charges were outlined & detailed with care

Thirty seven in all, prosecutors found there

The Walkers were nestled all snug in their beds

While visions of annuities danced in their heads

A place in Port Arthur to hang out with friends

Fine dining and bling & a Mercedes Benz

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter

Agent Brewer was there & looked into the matter

He peered through the window, then kicked in the door

And Calvin was cuffed, his head on the floor

The moon on the crest of the creosote pole

The city inspector would not be cajoled

"This work is sub-standard & not up to code"

The city employee so dutifully crowed

The school board met to discuss Calvin's fate

And Walker's Electric fueled the debate

"Let's keep him", said Woodrow, "Calvin's legit"

"He ain't been found guilty, they'll surely acquit"

The lackeys all cheered & began to applaud

Except for Tom Neild, who questioned the fraud

Then Butch stared him down, "Silence! You cracker"

"This district is black, & getting still blacker"

Now Ambres, Now Bush, Now Williams, Now Reece,

And snow white soul sistuh, Brassard The Obese

Explain to peckerwood how business is done

Cut Calvin the checks, let's get back to the fun!

Butch summoned a shyster, his name was Saint Dick

Dripping with snake oil, he knew every trick

The Pastor Reverend Doctor Deguerin!

His flock livened up and stopped their despairin'

A Bundle of cash he'd charge his new client

The defense lawyered up and got quite defiant

"Relax now kids, don't worry yourselves"

"We'll stack the jury with trailerhood elves"

"We'll find us a couple of dazed honky misters

And nine tons of dumb fun, horny white sisters

And just so they know that our side ain't jokin'

She's deep undercover, our wild card token

Rawl's prosecution appeared to be blurry

Like a foggy wintertime Christmas snow flurry

The Reverend Doctor offered objection

Mostly based on Calvin's complexion

Deguerin & Rawls went back to their bases

And both sides finished and rested their cases

Clark gave the instructions on deliberation

told jurors not to fret the potential duration

They went to their room to begin their discussin'

Outside overheard was screamin' and fussin'

The jury could never completely agree

Throw him in prison or just set him free

They passed a few messages on to Ron Clark

The judge, irritated, ignored the remark

"You keep on debating!", the note from the judge

But an obstinate few refused to be budged

So out came the jury, their paper in hand

"Have you reached a decision?" the judge did command

St. Dick looked at Walker and said with a smile

"Merry Christmas Dear Calvin, Fuckin' Mistrial!"